Crazy little thing called LOVE

How do you know you're in love?

Is it the warm fuzzy feeling you get which sends a tingle up your spine whenever you think of that person? Or perhaps when you know you're trying too damn hard to maintain your cool when actually you're dying for that person to notice you?

And how do you know if a person is into you? Is there a guide as to how to pick up the signs? Haih but being such a blur case in 'signal reception' doesn't help much >.<"

At this point I dunno if I am ready for it, or ever will.


But you know, it's really tiring playing this whole cat and mouse game.

And then it dawned upon her

Sheesh! It didn't occur to me that yesterday was my last day of lectures until I was on the bus back to Gambang! Not that I'm not happy or anything...in fact I am ECSTATIC!! Woots no more bbooorrriinnggg classes =D

HOLIDAY HERE I COME!!!

Am so looking forward to it and gosh I think I need to come up with a holiday plan quick!

Oh shoots. I forgot momentarily bout the finals part -___-

What's this *points around* supposed to be

So what's this *points around again* supposed to be is a journal to channel my frustration, anger and whatever negativity which cannot/hard to show to people- because no matter how much people like to ask how are you blablabla all they really hope to hear is "I'm fine thank you how about you" so that they can drone on and on about what-nots which is the very reason they start that conversation.

Which is why, in the very beginning almost no ones knows of the existence of this 'personal' space. I like the term personal space better cos I feel that 'blog' is too commercialized even though nothing is personal on the net *shrugs. So back to what I was saying, over time I began to open up a little. But! what it seem to have only done is restrict myself even more from letting my thoughts flow freely and is now reduced to boring what-I-dids. It has made me very self-conscious on what I write, how I write because I am just scared of what people think of me. What if I'm not exactly what they have thought me to be?! Gosh I dunno man. It's not like I am pretending or anything...just that you know how people like to paint those nice, quaint little pictures of you and thinks that you are still like that little girl in that picture when clearly you have overgrown that little girl? Why is everyone so critical? Sigh.

I am not happy and I am not gonna lie about that. Been angry, sad, frustrated and disappointed for a while and prolly still will go on for a while. Why is it so hard for me to be happy when all this while I have always been labeled as the happy-go-lucky one? Oh right, please refer to the above. I always get a lot of those motivational emails from Uncle Millan and Gabriel and all always say the same thing- that happiness is when you are able look beyond the imperfections, or something along the line. It's not like I do not have enough (in fact I'm blessed with more than enough) but there's always this kind of melacholy which keeps on tugging at my heart. And sometimes I am so pulled down by it that all I wanna do is to hide in a corner and cry for what it's worth. Tired and drained, unmotivated, listless, without passion.... and I do not know what to do.

Well, this semester's ending in exactly a month time and that's something to look forward to. In the meanwhile wish me luck as I continue to find my happy.

How my blog almost became a forgotten love child

Assignments, reports and my MicroC project have been and still are creeping up T___T Can't wait for the end of this semester but at the same time sssooooo not looking forward to the impending finals! Argh! Fuck this shit!

So it's been quiet around lately and to show that I do still have a life.....here are some going-ons a little before raya till now.

Surprise birthday cake for Nabilah at the beach! Hence the surprised reaction. Duh, obviously -.-

Met up with the girls during the raya break. It was lovely and how I wish all of us are near each other so that we can do this more often. The other day I chatted a while to Rachel on msn and it made me realise how much I've missed her that it makes me wanna cry T___T But! But! But!!! Plans are already on the way to meet again this year end I am so excited I can't wait cos by then Lydia and Shirley would be around too!

Bunny Koko drove us a whole freaking hour to this kelong place for seafood when I went to JB last raya break. And it's not even that nice -.-" But I enjoyed the journey though cos we had to pass by the industrial area and I saw Titan! Damn impressive wei.

Say hello to Nicky and Celion! My godnephew and niece! You do no know what monster really is until you've met them. Naughty is such an understatement. *shudders at memories

Cute fishies at the kelong restaurant! It's so funny cos whenever anyone stands in front of the aquarium they'd all come hurdling to the front. Haha!

Caged monkeys. How it wraps its young tightly, protecting it from the peering eyes and chilly night really touched me. If only all the mothers in the world are like this... So if next time anyone asks what is good parenting you can say, "Mun-keh!" wtf

Went to this really nice art cafe with the randomest of randoms decors. I love their quirky and unique designs and the fact that it's in an old nyonya like shophouse adds to its plus point! Highly recommended for romantic chillaxing night outs cos the cosy ambience and nice jazz/bossa nova (think Lina Ono) playing in the background really sets the mood. Ahh if only I have a special someone to share it with... Snap out of it yo!

Saw this really interesting bicycle man hanging on the ceiling in front of a bicycle shop. What a smart way to advertise huh! The dummy is even cycling!

RM2 sushi with coursemates! Okay not really cos it's civil meet E&E. Lol. Cleared a grand total of 91 plates and we E&E peeps beat them by 1 plate! ONE!!!

Finally tried out the kononnya famous nasi dagang in Kuantan. First heard of it from Uncle Millan and after some googling (as in google-ing, geddit?), voila~~ Nasi Dagang Ubai peeps!

Wow my life damn happening hor?!

Okay back to vhdl now o->--<

Hello everybuddy! It's been so long since I last posted something substantial because I am always either A)lazy, B)busy or C)lazy wtf

But seriously, this week has been one hell of a week what with everyday being an endless string of assignments/projects/reports. No thanks to my being a world class procrastinator during my 2 weeks break T___T

Been sleeping an average of 4 hours each day so tgi Friday! Cos I don't have classes on Fridays hence I get to catch up on my beauty sleep =D

So anywayyy everything's pretty much monotonous because on days when I have to go to Pekan for lectures by the time I'm back in Gambang I'd be half sleep-walking. Why the stupid university wants us to go there to study even though the whole construction is not done yet baffles me. Just my luck that my faculty and mech eng faculty kena T___T

For the past few days I've had to take the 6ish bus and then come back around 5/6 pm. Rest, dinner and then homework until 2/3 am. It's a vicious cycle everyday *pouts Why am I so ke lian?

Ok so maybe this post isn't very substantial after all cos I'm gonna just stop abruptly here cos it's almost 4.30 am and I'm tired.

At least you know I'm still alive and kicking wtf

Goodnight everybuddy!